Tuesday, December 30, 2003


Sorry about the poetry, really. Barney seemed to like his poem when I read it to him - I think I saw him smile. A little. Ok, so I read it to him about 678 times - but he did smile. Really.


Yesterday I was so bored that I tried my hand at some Martian poetry.

Martian friend
I come in peace
To seek
Our beginnings
Or my end

Yepp, I realize that ones a bit depressive...but that's the way I was feeling.

Barney how bold
To listen
And witness
The passing
Of Eternity

That one's for Barney, my friend. Ok, so I'm no poet really. Of course not. But what else is there to do? Apart from pinging....

It's that time again 

Ho hum, another try at pinging the Odyssey. Ping.....pause.... ping ..... pause.... I'm getting a bit tired at all this pinging around. I'd rather get down to business and drill some holes or sample some dirt. You know, get my hands dirty (so to speak).

Monday, December 29, 2003

Barney moved! 

I'm sure Barney moved. Maybe I have a spot of dust on my lense (this place is full of the red stuff) - but I'm positive he was more to the left yesterday. Or perhaps I've moved...eek.

My Merchandise 

Before I left, THEY went and got quite a bit of Beagle2 (that's me by the way) merchandise made up. I suppose they are quietly burning it all now - or trying to sell it on eBay. Ah well, one thing they should have packed up for me is this - the Beagle wooly hat.

Did I mention that it's fr**ing cold here?

Landing account 

I suppose I should fill you all (as if anyone's reading this) in on my little invasion of planet Mars. So, I touched down beautifully...a dream....well, ok it was a bit of a hard landing, but anyway. After the dust had settled (which takes ages here). And it's all red dust.. Yikes....what's that......over there.....something...is..... moving.......... wait......no....... please....... I come.... in..... peace....... don't touch that.... button......aaarrrhhhhhhhghhh

I always did think I should be in theatre - what do you think? Ho hum.


THEY sent me here to answer all sorts of questions: Is there life on Mars? Did life exist here in the past? So I suppose I'd better get started on them. OK, first one first.

Is there life on Mars? Hmmm....how am I supposed to answer that one? Ok, I have all these great gadgets for drilling holes and seeking out water .. but Mars is pretty big. I mean that's like putting me (a pint-sized spacecraft) in the middle of the Sahara Dessert and asking "is there ice-cream on planet Earth?". Or putting me in the middle of a Pop Idol casting and asking "Can earthlings actually sing?" Or....no wait, I'm getting carried away here....must..... focus... on .... mission .....


Sorry, I didn't post yesterday. I was feeling a bit - well - down. By now I had hoped THEY would have found me. THEY probably weren't even looking for me over Christmas - all those pies and brandy-butter....How many spacecraft are there on Mars anyway? Barney thinks I should be more positive. That's easy for him to say isn't it? Perhaps they've given up? That would suck. Maybe they've put me on eBay? "Mars lander in perfect condition (a few scratches) seeks new ownership - only bid if you can find and pick it up yourself please. Bidding starts at a quid.". I bet nobody bids.

Saturday, December 27, 2003


At least I'm not alone anymore. I have a new friend. Barney. Barney the Boulder. Pretty quiet really, doesn't talk much. In fact not at all. But he listens. And that's important. Colin used to listen - but he's not here. So I talk to Barney. Sorry, am I boring you?

Nights on Mars 

Nights are worst. Really. It gets dark and cold .. very cold... not that I mind, I'm built for that after all. But the darkness. I mean there is absolutely no light here. So I just sit here and wait for the sun to come up again. Tic-Tac-Toe anyone?

Ho Hum 

According to my internal data the fifth pass just took place. A mix of THEM using Odyssey and Jodrell Bank to find me. Heeeeellllllooooooooo, I'm up here. Ping....pause.....ping.....pause.... Come in Earth .. ha ha.

Friday, December 26, 2003


One of the reasons I'm here is to look for "life". Whatever that's supposed to be. At the moment the problem is that even if this 10 meter high Alien appeared in front of me - who could I tell. "Eh - hello ESA, I think I've found life". Ha ha. I mean they're not even picking up my simple beep. Ironic - no? Guess what, I am currently looking at about 5 pink aliens who are slowly approaching, armed with what seem like instr..............

I'm joking. It's as boring as hell here ... really. And red.

Hmm...I am trying at least 

Well, another period of blipping the Odyssey just passed. Beep....pause....Beep....pause and on and on. Trouble is I don't think Odyssey heard me. And to be honest I didn't see anything pass overhead. Perhaps I am completely in the wrong place or sending my signal in the wrong direction. That would be a bummer wouldn't it? I mean it's not as if this place is exactly crowded. I could do with some company - or at least a signal in reply.

Dear Blur! 

Hey Dave and Alex, I hope you read this. Now thanks for the music, no really it's great. But you know...couldn't you have put a few tunes inside my memory banks and not just the one? You know it got on my nerves before I even blast off. And then the long trip and all I could hear was that tune. And to be honest I'm really sick of it now! In fact I may not even sing it when I make contact. So there. Bah.


I guess I should start to feel homely here. After all it looks as though I'll be spending some time here. I should be somewhere in the Isidis Planitia region - an area roughly 1500 Kms in width. I mean can you imagine how I'm supposed to tell? I could be anywhere. On Mars I mean. After all there's no mistaking that fact at least. Red. Dust. Rocks. Boring as hell. And while we're on the subject. Oh wait, that's good for a new post.

Did he? 

Before I left, Mitch (Harris, one of my project family) told me that he was going to propose to his girlfriend about the time I landed. I wonder if he did? They are such a cute couple....aahh......Oh well I suppose I shouldn't really dwell on stuff like that. It could get me down I suppose. I mean it's not as if I can go to the wedding, can I. Never mind.

Phone home? 

Haha that's a good title - isn't it. I think it's from some film, can't remember really. So here I am stuck on Mars trying to call home using about the same power as a mobile-phone. Hmm..... Now THEY told me - "no problem Beagle" - "there's this spacecraft flying round the planet that will act as a relay AND we have these massive radio telescopes that pick up signals far weaker than yours". Yeah right. I mean you can't even get a decent connection on your mobile in the center of Darmstadt - so how do THEY think it's going to work up here? Bummer. I should have thought of that before they sent me up here. Right? Sorry, am I boring you? I don't really have anything better to do you see.

Come in Odyssey 

A short while after I landed, some system turned itself on - without as much as a "hey - I'm here", it started sending bursts of signals skywards. And then I remembered, I was supposed to be pinging the Odyssey. Ping....Pause....Ping....Pause. It went on for ages. But no answer. Which got a bit depressing after a while. In fact it's pretty boring up here in general. Red. Dust. Rocks. Not much to see really. I mean if you like red dust it's ok. But after a while it gets - well boring. Ho hum. Oh yes - Merry Christmas!

Bumpy landing - but where am I? 

Ok, I think I have things working now. So there I was drifting down to the surface humming a little tune that's been going round in my head for a while now. I think I'm supoposed to hum the tune to Earth once I get a connection. Anyway, I landed on the surface - not sure where - it all looks the same round here. Red. Stones. Lots of them. And dust - you wouldn't believe. So, I sat there for a while humming the tune and thinking "what now"? And then something clicked.


I needed to adjust my solar panel -- is this better...aahhhh. Ok, so here I am on the surface of Mars. Trouble is I don't think anyone is picking up my signal. Signal? Wait a moment did I turn it on...I need to check that. Back in a moment.

Ah, that's better 

Looks like I got the weblog set up. Lonely here really. Ride was fine but the landing a bit hardfddddkklöööööööppppa7878787........

Thursday, December 25, 2003

zzzzzzdddgetting jhzt 

zzzzjud´st stzzzarting dghcg thus




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